tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26094423.post5552099274334467713..comments2024-02-08T23:16:36.239+13:00Comments on bottle broke: where is the seafeddabonnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08365326300429832990noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26094423.post-45486632679564915542010-07-15T19:18:48.499+12:002010-07-15T19:18:48.499+12:00kia ora robb, quite true: the sea and mountains ar...kia ora robb, quite true: the sea and mountains are never too far here!<br /><br />@gauri: so true!feddabonnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08365326300429832990noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26094423.post-19523756919462876832010-07-13T17:58:01.040+12:002010-07-13T17:58:01.040+12:00predictable, gloomy, yes. agreed..
words and whe...predictable, gloomy, yes. agreed.. <br /><br />words and where you place them. these are the kind of little decisions that matter so much, no? :)Gauri Gharpurehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09887888023298949657noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26094423.post-67008502965383988582010-07-12T21:06:33.872+12:002010-07-12T21:06:33.872+12:00Kia ora feddabonn,
I can sense the sea deep withi...Kia ora feddabonn,<br /> I can sense the sea deep within you. The sea and the mountains are never too seperate from each other in this beautiful land. We need to keep it that way.<br />RobbRuahineshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09398484733805119294noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26094423.post-10029624526579302602010-07-12T16:11:20.395+12:002010-07-12T16:11:20.395+12:00@roob: comes of living so near the sea i guess. it...@roob: comes of living so near the sea i guess. it feels like it is constantly lapping at my dreams.<br /><br />@gauri: that is how it originally was, and it changed back. i felt the 'final' at the end was too predictable, and unnecessarily gloomy. also preferred the rhythm of having the extra syllables in the first bit, and not in the repetition. thanks for this kind of feedback, is what i need more of!feddabonnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08365326300429832990noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26094423.post-25951235300106827982010-07-11T17:27:42.997+12:002010-07-11T17:27:42.997+12:00nice.
cud the second stanza come at the last? th...nice. <br /><br />cud the second stanza come at the last? thought so because 'final' would end the poem with a punch..Gauri Gharpurehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09887888023298949657noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-26094423.post-87504605194287878112010-07-09T17:21:12.769+12:002010-07-09T17:21:12.769+12:00I like this a lot. Is this a new one? Your stuff i...I like this a lot. Is this a new one? Your stuff is going sea-ward these days.happyredroosterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17493643574913968658noreply@blogger.com