the evenings here are quiet and long-
the dying strains of a sad grand song
heard on a cheap transistor.
munnar's hills are far away
and i cannot hear gokarna's beaches
and though i cannot be where i would
at least i know the sunset is,
at least the sunset is.
10 comments:
beautiful
thank you! another dear friend (who refused to type this out) said it was rather abrupt. then again, most of my poems are-i the anti-dylan. (not that i don't like his work, just that i wish he would edit).
am wondering whether i should put in a closing line-"at least the sunset is". what say?
no. adding 'at least the sunset is" would, to my mind, belabour the point, which i think has already been made.
as far as abruptness is considered - what's wrong with abrupt poetry? i am all for it.
been reading about poetry. apparently there's a lot o work going round on syllable length of each line and all that! wow!
Though i'm not much of a fan of poetry, i have to say this one's beautiful....and i'm guessing u added the line 'at least the sunset is' later on? A good decision, I feel, it's got a more complete feel because of that line....
thankyou musab, esPECIALLY snce you are not a fan of poetry, your appreciation is precious.
i did not, in fact, add the the line, just used it as a title.
Just think of cliffside shillong each time a miss a sunset
this is one fantastic poem i ve read in a loong, long time...
@wormwood: my shillong memories are all dulled. what think of picture, huh?
@gauri: thanks! would also like to know WHAT it is you like!
Oh wow.
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