the lie of Authority

a recipie


3 small stuffed toys, preferably from McDonald's, but Disney will do
1 noose, pre-prepared
1 sachet of ketchup, from any fast food joint
1 knife, sharp
1 pre-dawn darkness, with streetlight attachment to work by


Prepare the noose beforehand. Hang each toy by the neck till dead, 15 minutes, or till you get bored whichever is sooner. Bring the body down from the noose,and lay down on chosen workspace. Find the main stitch (usually the back or the belly) and proceed to cut open. start with the back/belly, open up the legs, then end with the head/jaw. Appropriately add ketchup (or not) as desired. Remove stuffing and keep aside. Repeat for all the three. Mix in remaining ketchup with skin or stuffing, according to taste. Sell the results on eBay/trademe, as preferred. Donate all money raised to Ronald McDonald House Charities or the Walt Disney Company Foundation.

Why did I do this? (Pick one)

a. To highlight the hypocritical bloodthirst of a civilisation that eats meat but shrinks from knowing how and where that meat comes from
b. To resist a worldview swamped by the cute and purveyors of the cute
c. As a pathetic attempt at registering some sort of pseudo-symbolic protest against how corporations such as McDonalds and Disney are taking over this planet, particularly our food and our imagination
d. Because I am a really twisted bastard
e. As a cheap stunt to increase my blog hits
f. All of the above
g. None of the above

for the cicadas

what then, are the sounds
of this city?

is it the gentle tap-tap-tap of a million keyboards
(writing shakespeare, no doubt)
or the deep bass rumble of the chimneys
in a thousand asian takeaways?

maybe the laughter that stumbles drunkenly out of the cafés
to swing, stagger and CRASH!
at our (suitably) jandal-ed feet
or the plainitive wail of a car alarm
being industriously ignored?

what then, are the sounds
of this city?

for the cicadas, at least here,
are dead.

[with thanks to taonga puoro, by brian flintoff]